wellness

I’ve been collecting life-force energy for some time now. Having more deposits than withdrawals is part of my healthy aging plan. I think this is a brilliant strategy for wellness of all kinds, but is particularly important as we age.

What most people think of as “aging” is what I see as the compound interest of lifelong energetic debt. We can get away with neglecting of our bodies, even abusing them, for some time, but eventually the consequences catch up.

Every decision we make can include an awareness of this simple math. Will this action yield more or less healing energy in my system?

Don’t get me wrong- I’m no teetotaler. I don’t always opt for the supremely healthy choice, but when I don’t, I do the math first to decide if the results will be worth it.

Today, I went out for lunch. I usually prepare my own meals, but for the past 24 hours, I haven’t been able to stop thinking about bread. Very strange. I wondered if perhaps it was my body speaking to me? More likely a long-silenced part that never got onboard 25 years ago when I learned I had a wheat sensitivity. Whatever, the thoughts became a craving and I figured a sandwich would do the trick.

I knew that mediocre bread wouldn’t cut it. And gluten free bread isn’t usually great. It’s either crazy expensive, has questionable ingredients to make up for the gluey gluten goodness that traditionally holds bread together, or crumbles in your hands. I couldn’t think of any way to satisfy this desire at the grocery store and I had nothing at home that would suffice.

So off to the bakery I go. I chose what would be considered healthy fare by any American standards. Chicken salad on walnut raisin. Not a hoagie (hero, sub, grinder or bun the size of my head), just two slices of bread. It was most satisfying and quelled that incessant loop in my head.

As I stood up to bus my plate, I had to cough. This is highly unusual for me. Suddenly, there was a lot of phlegm in my throat. As I walked out the door, I noticed I was sniffly. Shortly thereafter, I was gassy. And then my ears started to itch.

No big deal, really. My body can manage all of this. But it’s using life-force to do so. I don’t need to feel guilty or worry or make amends. It’ll all even out if I offer an extra deposit- such as time in nature or meditating.

If this was my habit, though, it’s easy to see how I’d eventually end up in life-force deficiency. And I’d get chronically stuffy, which could create the perfect environment for a virus to move in. Or I could medicate the symptoms, ignoring the root cause and accrue even more problematic symptoms.

I thought of my friend Mika, who carries a digestive enzyme supplement with her for times like these. There are definitely ways to mitigate less than stellar decisions. But what I really want to point out is that I recognized these symptoms because they aren’t the norm for me. Many people wouldn’t identify phlegm-iness as a result of food choices.

The more active I am in building my life-force savings, the more obvious the costly fees are because the contrast is so great.

There is no one-sized fits all life-force savings plan. I’m not suggesting that you don’t eat out, or you don’t eat chicken salad sandwiches, or you go wheat- free. But I am suggesting you do some detective work, some experimenting, and begin an honest exploration into your expenditures and investments.

If you find yourself digging in your heels, unwilling to give up certain behaviors you know to be problematic, that’s ok too. To balance things out, you can put your focus on life-force deposits. So rather than taking something away, you can think of adding in a beneficial practice like yoga or tai chi. Or build a monthly session of massage and/or Reiki into your budget and calendar.

Find ways to make more deposits, even if your withdrawals remain the same, and you’ll accrue wellness credits over time. The benefit to quitting the habits that have less than desirable results, at least for a few weeks, is that your body can recalibrate and you’ll be better able to notice its reaction to something as simple as eating a sandwich for lunch.

Accruing Life-Force and Healthy Aging

I’ve been collecting life-force energy for some time now. Having more deposits than withdrawals is part…
Tight muscles are literally my business. It’s common knowledge that stretching will help, but I usually disagree.

To be clear, I mean deliberately holding a stretch to remedy muscle tension. I think that stretching like a cat and moving through the body’s range of motion is great for maintaining mobility. But sustaining a forward bend to address tight hamstrings, for example, often backfires.

So I made a three and half minute video to explain why.

P.S. I created a follow up video outlining what I do recommend.

I don’t recommend targeted stretching, and here’s why.

Tight muscles are literally my business. It’s common knowledge that stretching will help, but I usually…
A new client returned for his second massage to report that after his first session, he had slept without discomfort for the first time in months. Oh the joy of hearing updates like this! We still have work to do releasing patterns created by overuse and postural habits, but he was feeling hopeful.

He went on to tell me that his previous experiences with massage were so intense that he had been in massive pain for three or four days after each treatment. After experiencing relief from our session, he had come to the conclusion that the previous “strong sensation” (aka painful) approach had actually been making the condition worse.

I concur.

We had a brief chat about pain, the fight or flight reflex, and the resulting release of stress hormones and contraction of muscles. It’s my intention to create the exact opposite effect by encouraging the relaxation response: the release of feel-good hormones, unwinding tension, deep breathing, and muscle melting. It’s part of my mission to educate people about the power of coaxing the body into relaxation rather than attempting (and almost always failing) to force it into submission.

The thing that brings me even more joy is the next step in healing where people recognize that wellness is the result of listening to the messages their bodies deliver, treating themselves kindly, and taking good care of themselves. We live in a world that values doing more, going faster, powering through the upsets, and pushing ourselves incredibly hard. Until we begin to value wellness, relaxation, pleasure, and comfort equally as much, if not more, we will continue to suffer with chronic pain and promote the internal conditions that contribute to chronic and debilitating disease.

If you’re interested in a gentle, therapeutic massage and you live in the Philly area, this is my jam. I’m a no-pain specialist. The goal is to meet muscles where they are, sinking in until the first hint of resistance says stop, and lingering there while inviting the tension to soften. Schedule online here.

If you live elsewhere, I’d encourage you to do some research before scheduling a session. Some therapists are firmly entrenched in the “no pain, no gain” agenda and therefore going gentle is not in their repertoire at all. There’s a local studio that uses 💪 💪 💪 next to each of the providers’ names as an indicator of pressure range. Just like the 🌶️ 🌶️ 🌶️ rating in a Thai restaurant, you can better choose appropriately if you know what to expect.

(I’ll add that out of a possible five 💪, none of these therapists offered a level 1, and only two of the eight offer level 2. There was a whole lot of hoopla about seven of them going all the way to the max. Sigh.)

If you call a spa and ask for a certain kind of pressure, you’re likely to get a “yes”. Yes, sir, how high sir? The goal in a spa is to book lots of sessions and the front desk folks are eager to get you in the door. You might try asking which therapist they would recommend given your desire to relax instead of suffer. Since they might never have had a massage, might enjoy something entirely different, or don’t know the staff’s strengths and weaknesses, this approach is hit or miss.

Instead, I’d suggest going with an individual in private practice. Someone who works for him/herself and has hopefully created some content online so you can get an idea of what to expect. Sure, the spas and the franchises will have glossier websites with lots of bells and whistles. But this mission is about finding a good match for your needs, and that’s likely to come from a humble site like this one.

You could start simply by saying that you enjoy a relaxing/gentle/medium or light pressure/full body treatment and wonder if that’s available. Then listen to what they don’t say. They might agree, but with hesitation suggesting that this is out of their comfort zone or that they just aren’t into work like this, even though they can do it.

Personally, I’d rather have no massage than to suffer through one that hurts or to have to constantly ask the therapist to back off. AND there are enough of us providers out there, I feel confident that you can find a compatible practitioner if you do a little exploring.

Massage doesn’t have to hurt. I truly believe that it shouldn’t. But you’re going to have to advocate for yourself because much of the world doesn’t know this yet.

Painful Massage is Not the Answer

A new client returned for his second massage to report that after his first session, he…
Whether you’re unsure of how to get your healing journey started or stalled somewhere along the way, it can help to have a simple, daily practice to rely on. Something to sink your teeth into.

There’s so much information available to us these days that’s it’s easy to get lost down never-ending rabbit holes, exploring all the options, but never actually taking the first step.

I love kundalini yoga. I find it to be immensely transformative. Mantra, mudra, breathwork, movement, and meditation are all basic components that are combined for synergistic rewards.

You’ll have to leave your need to know at the door. While there are indeed reasons why making particular sounds and hand gestures creates a particular effect, the learning of these reasons often leads to years of study. Study is not practice. It produces information, not results.

I will say that chanting produces a vibration in the head that is said to affect the pineal gland. If that means nothing to you, don’t worry. It’s not necessary to understand to reap the rewards.

I’m not going to get into the history of kundalini yoga. Let’s just say it’s THOUSANDS of years old. From a time when there were fewer distractions and adepts could more easily drop into the moment and their bodies and notice the changes brought about by their efforts.

Nor will I get into the potential benefits of this particular practice other than to say it can help you get unstuck. But only if you do it.

I’ve chosen share kirtan kriya because it is so easy to do. It requires a mere 12 minutes of your time. It has four simple syllables, to be combined with four simple hand gestures.

This video does a good job of guiding the way. The chant is done aloud, then whispered, then silently, then whispered again, and finally aloud. Just follow along.

Traditionally a practice like this is performed for 40 consecutive days for maximum benefit. If that seems like a big commitment, ask yourself how much you’d like to experience relief. If you want to feel differently, you must do something different.

If you have access to Reiki, activate it before you begin and enjoy the bonus of marinating in healing life-force energy. While Reiki remains my number one all time suggestion for healing, for those who haven’t yet been trained or don’t want to or have access to a practitioner, this is a fantastic alternative.

It’s especially great for folks who find meditation or resting in stillness to be torturous. The movements and chanting give the mind something to focus on. This can be done sitting in a chair or standing, even lying down, if that’s necessary.

What do you have to lose? Twelve minutes a day is a pretty minimal investment. Give it a try and see how it feels. Showing up for yourself on a consistent basis is one of the most compassionate and empowering acts possible.

And you’re worth it.

Feeling Stuck? Try This.

Whether you’re unsure of how to get your healing journey started or stalled somewhere along the…
We have so much information at our fingertips today that it can be overwhelming. If you’ve ever attended Google University seeking a self-diagnosis and treatment, you’ve likely come up with tons of contradictory information.

How I Healed XYZ in 5 Days

7 Easy Steps to Cure XYZ

The One Thing That Fixed Everything

Headlines like these abound. They often lead to confusion, frustration, and sadly even a worsening of the situation.

Why? Because they are addressing symptoms, not the root cause.

Let’s use insomnia as an example.

There are a gazillion reasons people don’t sleep well. It could be churning thoughts, physical discomfort, a lumpy mattress, a snoring spouse, or excess caffeine.

(Not an Ambien deficiency. You might find relief through a prescription, but the side effects often outweigh the benefits. Please consider exploring the underlying condition while you’re taking the pills so maybe you won’t need them someday in the future.)

Each of these causes will obviously have a different plan of treatment.

So when I read about someone who quit drinking coffee, improved their sleep patterns, and touts this as the number one cure, I’m a bit tetchy. I don’t even drink coffee, so who’s that going to help me?

Whether you’re dealing with insomnia or back pain (two conditions I’m intimately familiar with on a personal and professional level), psoriasis, headaches, or fatigue, there are a few things I can suggest that will always be beneficial as they help uncover the root cause.
1. Stress management. There are countless practices that help the body digest the physiological consequences of chronic stress. They will calm the mind, reduce tension, and support all the body’s systems.
2. Curiosity. Be your own detective and explore what’s going on in your life, in your psyche, in your body. If you’re trying to quit a problematic habit, get curious about what’s underneath and why you reach for the behavior or substance and how you might circumvent that pattern.
3. Compassion. Be kind to yourself! Especially if you’re struggling and suffering. Your inner dialog has a direct impact on your physiology. Berating yourself or stewing in resentment will increase your stress response, cortisol levels, tension, and inflammation.
4. Reduce exposure to toxins. Including emotional toxins in the form of unhealthy relationships, doomscrolling, and the compare and despair dynamic so prevalent on Instagram.
5. Presence. Learn to be with yourself, especially during difficult times. Develop a daily practice of turning inwards, with compassion and curiosity, and check in rather than checking out. This can be uncomfortable, so start small. Three minutes can go a long way.
6. Breathe. Obviously you are breathing or you wouldn’t be reading this. But what is the quality of your breath? Shallow and rapid? Can you drop into presence and cultivate a calming, nourishing pattern? Some people swear by “box” breath; I’m partial to extending the exhales so they’re slightly longer than the inhales.
7. Boost your life-force. This is big. And overlooked completely in our medical system. If you are chronically depleted, running on empty, burning the candle at both ends, taking care of everybody but yourself, your body will try to communicate its distress with you. I recommend listening before the consequences amplify!
Insight Timer is a free app and a wonderful resource for simple, guided practices that will help you do many of these things. I found the yoga nidra (a sort of meditation where you systematically bring attention to areas of the body) to be invaluable.

My all-time favorite and go-to remedy is Reiki. Reiki treatments offer an infusion of spiritually-guided life-force energy that relieves stress, tension, anxiety, and pain and promotes the body’s innate healing abilities.

It won’t, however, address your spouse’s snoring-like-a-chainsaw issue. For that you’re going to need some hefty earplugs or a separate bedroom. I’ve heard about successful elimination of snoring by diffusing sweet marjoram essential oil, or changing pillows or sleeping position.

While Reiki is amazing and can help with a lot of problems, it really depends on the root cause. It won’t make you sleep soundly after a late-night triple espresso, but it can help you build better sleep habits.

There is no such thing as a miracle cure. But there are numerous ways to address the root problem. All of them will require your participation and willingness to make changes.

If you’d like some support in this arena, you can use this button to book a session.

Book a remote or in-person treatment
Getting to the Root

We have so much information at our fingertips today that it can be overwhelming. If you’ve…
This is an amazing article from a therapist on Substack. If you’re overwhelmed by your role as a caregiver in any form, facing burn out, or stuck in an ongoing pattern of over-giving and under-receiving, I hope you’ll find it helpful.

“Remember this: in nature, no single tree holds up the forest alone. Sometimes the strongest roots are the ones that know how to rest.”

I can’t seem to embed it here, so you’ll have to use the link above. I posted the photo for relatability.

Support for Caregivers

This is an amazing article from a therapist on Substack. If you’re overwhelmed by your role…
If you’ve ever followed someone’s advice for healing an ailment and found yourself disappointed in the results, you aren’t alone.

Lots of people share with me the tricks they use for xyz and often they are things I’ve already tried to no avail.

It’s frustrating.

The thing is, the root of the problem is often hidden. Two people might have frequent headaches, but the same treatment might not be effective for both of them since the causes are different.

If you’re dehydrated and have a headache, a big glass of water can work wonders. You can go on to write a book about water being the miracle healer, yet it will be 100% ineffective for someone with a mold allergy or a tension headache.

No worries, though. Your body knows. There is an innate wisdom within and you can learn to access it. I’m not saying it’s easy, at least not in the beginning, but like any skill, you can hone it with practice.

My suggestion is to be like a cat. They move in ways that feel GOOD! Now, don’t go researching “how to move like a cat”. That’s something I would have done in the past. 🙄

Instead, feel into what movements your body would enjoy. Let pleasure be your guide.

It all starts with an intention to tap in and honor the messages that come from your body. Next, you’ll need to create time and space to listen. Many of us are just running around all day, every day, so that we can’t receive the messages that come through.

Remember the olden days when phones were atttached to the walls of homes? And you had to be at there when the call came through? And then you had to pick it up, at that moment, and listen to the voice on the other side?

It’s a lot like that.

Your body will tell you how it wants to move and rest, what it wants to eat and when, and all sorts of other information- if you pay attention.

But you have to be available to pick up the phone.

Yes, this means forgetting about tons of external rules about how many steps you should take or what your target heart rate is. It might mean shaking things up in your family, workplace, or circle of friends.

But, let’s face it. If you keep on doing what you’re doing, you’ll continue to get what you’ve already got. I’m guessing that if you’re reading this, you’d prefer a different outcome.

Why not go directly to the source of wisdom?

I find Reiki incredibly helpful for increasing my clarity, motivation, and capacity to receive messages from my body. If you want to do the work, it could help you too. Or if you prefer to receive support and let me do the work, that can also help. It’s not the only way by any means. As far as I can tell, it’s the simplest, easiest, and most accessible though.

One of the things I really love about Reiki is that the healing energy sinks beneath the symptoms and addresses the initial imbalance. It might be in the mental, emotional, spiritual, energetic, or circumstantial realm which would have been overlooked by modern medical treatment.

What would your body appreciate today? If it’s Reiki or some gentle bodywork, why not schedule a treatment? Or perhaps you’d like a walk, a bath, some time on your yoga mat, or a nap. Only you know for sure.

Book a session

Healing Isn’t One Size Fits All

If you’ve ever followed someone’s advice for healing an ailment and found yourself disappointed in the…
This is a fantastic article on what is generally considered a mysterious and incurable condition. Viewed through a holistic lens, there are many ways to treat the underlying causes of CFS.

I’ll add that Reiki is a safe, simple, and accessible modality for addressing many of the goals (improve gut biome, strengthen immune system, etc) she describes. I love it when someone does the research that supports what I’ve known instinctively for ages!

I hope someone finds this helpful! Even if only to shift perspective away from the modern medicine route as the gold standard. Just because something can’t be seen under a microscope doesn’t mean it won’t have profound impact on health.

I’d love to hear from anyone who has experience in this realm. Is there anything that worked for your recovery?

How to Recover From Chronic Fatigue Syndrome

Healing Chronic Fatigue by Sarah Warren

This is a fantastic article on what is generally considered a mysterious and incurable condition. Viewed…
I had a breakthrough last week in a chronic pain pattern. Woohoo! I discovered tension in an adjacent area that was torquing my pelvis and causing discomfort in my lower back, hip, and leg. This awareness is huge as it points my efforts towards the cause of the imbalance rather than chasing the symptoms.

Chasing symptoms never provides lasting results because the source of the problem remains unresolved. A particular symptom might diminish, only to have another appear in its place.

Nearly all of the problems that people bring to my office are symptoms. Despite near- heroic efforts, clients have not been able to resolve issues because they were looking at the superficial problem and not what was underneath.

I don’t say this with any judgment or blame. We don’t know what we don’t know, and we can only do the best with the information that we have at the time. I’m offering some new information that will hopefully be helpful moving forward.

I have long hair. It often gets caught in my coat zipper in the winter. It’s obvious that the problem is coming from the zipper, but I feel it in my scalp. There’s no amount of intervention at the level of my scalp that is going to yield relief.

The same is often true for that crick in the neck, the burning in the shoulder blade, the ache in the elbow.

My massage teacher used an analogy of a schoolyard. He said that the complaining muscle was like the nerd, but if you looked closely, you could find the bully lurking nearby. The bully is the source of the pain, the nerd is the one that suffers. (I pretty nerdy myself, so please don’t let this word cause offense. It’s just an illustration.)

OK, so now what?

It’s possible to work with a pain pattern on your own if you have the capacity to bring compassionate awareness to what you’re feeling and remain present through the discomfort.

Sadly, few of us have any training in how to do that. These are skills that can be learned and I’d fully encourage you to begin today. Can you be with yourself for two full minutes, or 15 deep breaths, with 100% of your attention turned inward? Start there and build up your tolerance over time.

See if you can separate out the emotions that may be stored in this area clamoring for your care. Or the stories about previous experiences and concerns about the future. If you have been raised in the western world, you mostly likely have been conditioned by society, Saturday morning cartoons, magazine ads, pop culture, and Instagram to have certain beliefs about your body and how it is “supposed” to look and function.

Then there’s the way you use your body, such as repetitive movement patterns, your posture, and the way your body has adapted to your environment. Perhaps the most disruptive, hidden influence is how the nervous system responds to anything unfamiliar as if it were a threat and causes muscles to tense. When this happens over and over again, the muscles sometimes get locked in their contracted positions, perpetually ready for a threat that never comes.

We could also look at causes for systemic inflammation such as allergens in our foods, toxins we’re exposed to daily, latent viruses, chronic stress, inadequate sleep, and mold spores in the walls.

Let’s not forget about the energy body. When life-force is depleted, our systems don’t have the juice they need to function optimally. When energy flow is blocked, chakras are underutilized. When the flow is clogged, often the backlog feels painful and we unknowingly look for ways to discharge this pent up energy that can have detrimental effects.

To be thorough, I’ll add that the soul also plays a role. Not that it needs healing, as it’s eternal and whole by nature, but because we can become separate from it through trauma and programming. When we’re aligned with our essence and purpose, the other elements of healing are more easily accessible.

In short, our body, mind, emotions, instincts, and soul are all intricately woven together and need to be addressed fully to heal. If you’ve been working with an issue to no avail, try switching your focus to one of the other realms.

Or try Reiki. It works wonders as it addresses all the parts, striving to bring them all into harmony. You can learn to give yourself daily doses of healing energy or book yourself a session. You don’t even need to leave home.

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Chasing Symptoms

I had a breakthrough last week in a chronic pain pattern. Woohoo! I discovered tension in…