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  • I found this podcast with Dr. Rick and (his son) Forest Hanson, to be very helpful. In my Reiki practice, many clients and students are searching for tools to handle difficult family dynamics. Those of us on spiritual and/or healing journeys have often come across practices of forgiveness and compassion which might seem to butt heads with practices of self-care and boundary setting. Confusion can arise, further complicating things.

    To say it’s a complex issue is really an understatement! Whether you’re the one choosing distance, or the one being distanced from, you might find some comfort or useful tips in this mindful and meaningful dialog. It’s geared toward parent/child relationships, but could easily be adapted to friendships.

    From podcast notes: “We’ve received a substantial number of questions from our listeners regarding familial estrangement: when one family member distances themselves from the others, or chooses not to interact with them at all. It’s a common and extremely challenging situation, and the pain related to it can be particularly intense during the holidays. Today on Being Well, Dr. Rick and Forrest Hanson discuss family estrangement, particularly focusing on parents and children, and how the questions we engage in this territory apply more broadly to how we balance our own boundaries with the responsibilities we have toward other people.”

    Navigating Estrangement Situations

    I found this podcast with Dr. Rick and (his son) Forest Hanson, to be very helpful.…

  • Perhaps the most valuable lesson I’ve learned on this journey of self-care is one of not getting lost in the world of technology. I think we all know what it’s like to sit down in front of a computer to do one quick thing and not emerge for an hour or more. When my schedule is tight, I keep a strong focus on my priorities, which means not getting distracted by electronics, especially in the morning before I meditate.

    The challenge lies in the fact that I use my smartphone for a lot of self-care practices. Music for yoga is stored in there, as well as my brain booster apps, affirmation meditations, and my idea list for this blog. I often check the weather on my phone before heading out for a hike, and it’s very tempting to see what’s happening on Facebook. Yet I know what’s down that rabbit hole and that I can easily get sucked into scrolling through status updates and loss track of time.

    Since I value the convenience my gadgets provide, I’m disciplining myself to use them intelligently. Many days I have plenty of time on the train to respond to messages. On days that I don’t, I actually schedule time for electronic communication and do my best to stick with it. This means checking email and Facebook two, maybe three times a day and not 4oo. This simple strategy really helps keep me on track and allows me the time to focus on my goals without getting waylaid. It also improves productivity because I’m not rushing to get back to what I “should” be doing or multi-tasking.

    Just as I schedule time for working on my website or newsletter and time for exercise, rest, or creative projects, I’ve come to an awareness that social media and other communication needs a time slot. While I do wish to remain in touch with friends and clients near and far, I’m not willing to sacrifice the supportive practices I’ve developed over the past six weeks. This technique helps provide a healthy boundary that prevents surfing the web from overtaking my precious downtime. Basically I’m using my gadgets to support my goals rather than letting them use me.

     

    Radical Self-Care, Gadgets

    Perhaps the most valuable lesson I’ve learned on this journey of self-care is one of not…

  • Launching a new business while working two part time jobs feels a lot like rafting down the rapids without a paddle. The current takes me along for the ride and I do my best to hold on. I just keep doing the task that shows up in front of me and steadily moving forward. There’s really no point in struggling or trying to push the river, as that is just exhausting and rather pointless. I’m reminded of my hero, Louise Hay, saying that she started her now-international publishing company simply by opening the mail and answering the phones. Meaning: do the work at hand.

    Well, it just so happens that there’s loads of work at hand! My to-do list keeps growing and yet there are still the same number of hours in each day. Inspiration comes and goes, sometimes at inconvenient times, and interrupts my plans. Yet I’m committed to taking good care of myself; physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually so that I may remain healthy and happy and have a full life. It has become apparent that protecting my downtime a necessary step in this discovery process.

    I’ve been failing at guarding my personal time. It’s somewhat scarce these days and all the more precious for that. Carving out time for self-care practices each morning and evening has become second nature to me: I have blocked out an entire morning each week for pajama time , I make an effort to connect with my friends, and I’m clear about which hours are reserved for work. The spaces that remain I consider to be recreational: reading a novel, watching Netflix, listening to music, going for a walk, or puttering around my home are some examples of how I fill my personal time.

    The challenge lies in that it’s easy to be distracted by another task on my to-do list. One more email, another revision to my website, updating my calendar, folding the laundry are all important items that can interrupt me and before I know it, the small window of opportunity to play has slipped away. I now recognize the importance of having unstructured downtime in my self-care regime, and the need to create boundaries to protect it. So I’m silencing my phone and resisting the urge to check messages or the weather or my schedule or… whatever  when I’m reading or watching a show. I’m learning how to overlook my unmade bed and piles of unopened mail. I’m allowing emails to accumulate until it’s time to clock into business mode.

    Basically I’m choosing to focus on the activity that I’m doing in each moment and get every morsel of pleasure that I can out of my brief and priceless downtime. I’m generating awareness that while my work is indeed very important, it is not the only, or even the most important thing. I’m creating a rich and full life for myself that includes balance between work and play and that means unplugging every day, if only for 20 minutes, to enjoy myself and be free. Downtime. It makes uptime more productive!

    Radical Self-Care, Downtime

    Launching a new business while working two part time jobs feels a lot like rafting down the…

  • Some of the most profound changes I see in my Reiki practice come when I work with caregivers. Whether amateur or professional, full or part time, people who take care of others give a lot of themselves, and unfortunately often take on unwanted and unnecessary energy during their acts of service. Parents, teachers, nurses, doctors, bodyworkers, councilors, and ministers are just a few examples of what I am referring to. Often the type of person who is drawn to such fields is sensitive, empathic, generous, and loving. They want to help others, and if they’re not careful, they do so at great personal cost.

    I learned very early in my massage career how important clean boundaries are. I had excellent tools to clear my energy field and prevent my clients’ issues from affecting me. Yet there were days when I was tired, overworked, or stressed out that my boundaries were weak and I got “slimed”. I remember one day in particular when all four of my clients had neck pain as their primary complaint, and later that night, so did I! Alas, it’s not always so easy to track stray energy. Sometimes we feel drained, funky, tired, cranky, or just “off” for no obvious reason. Especially when working with clients who are in pain, it is easy to over-give or pick up vibes that don’t belong to us. I think we can all agree that this serves no one. We can never suffer enough to alleviate someone else’s suffering. It just doesn’t work that way.

    Reiki is the most powerful technique I have experienced for clearing any unwanted energies from our auras, bodies, hearts, and souls. It re-establishes healthy energy flow within, connects us to natural cosmic vibrations, and releases any excess junk that we may have picked up inadvertently. Reiki helps us return to ourselves and renew our connection to Spirit. What’s even more exciting in my eyes, is that regular Reiki “tune-ups” can keep our energy fields vibrant and shiny and our protective force fields healthy and strong. It’s so much easier, more comfortable, more convenient, more balanced to prevent ourselves from allowing unwanted energy in than to release it once it is already present. There is enough pain, discomfort and disease in the world already; we don’t need to absorb any of it in the process of helping others.

    Reiki for Caregivers

    Some of the most profound changes I see in my Reiki practice come when I work…