pain relief

I met a client this week who shared after her session that she was surprised that I didn’t painfully dig in to her muscles. (She came to me by way of a gift certificate and hadn’t seen my website where I very clearly state that my style of bodywork is NOT painful.)

It gave me the opportunity to address what I believe is a very common myth that pushing really hard on sore muscles is the way to create relief. In my experience, this is absolutely not true! At least for me and the thousands of people I’ve worked with.

What happens when the body feels pain? It tenses. How does that help? It doesn’t.

And when someone is experiencing chronic pain, their muscles are already tense and their nervous system set to hyper-protection mode. Even the hint of pain activates an instinct to fight or flee. How does that help? It doesn’t!

Instead, I find that a soothing, gentle approach allows the nervous system to calm and the muscles to melt. I meet the painful areas with a curious and compassionate attention: “Hello, I see you there, what can I do for you?” Rather than an attack: “Bad muscle, I’ll pummel you into submission!”

I don’t know where where this “no pain, no gain” mentality comes from in the massage realm, but it saddens me that people think that they need to suffer to experience relief. Or worse yet, that because they are unwilling to suffer, bodywork is not for them.

There are tons of deep tissue therapists out there who want to jab an elbow into your achy spots. If that’s your thing, you’ll have no problem finding someone to hurt you. But it isn’t me.

If you are pain averse and want your session to be enjoyable while leaving you feeling relaxed and gooey, that’s my wheelhouse.

Working with the nervous system, musculoskeletal system, endocrine system, emotional and energetic bodies is a lot more nuanced and effective than pushing hard on a sore spot.

It doesn’t mean a feather-light touch, either, just in case that’s a concern. It means meeting the tissue as it is, sinking in as far as it allows, and responding when it says stop.

It’s a technique that respects the body and its innate wisdom rather than trying to force an arbitrary solution from the outside.

If you’re in the Philly area, I’m here to be of service. If you live elsewhere, don’t be afraid to inquire with the provider before you book a session. Any respectable therapist will be able to answer your questions and confirm if they are able to offer a pain-free experience.

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Massage doesn’t have to hurt!

I met a client this week who shared after her session that she was surprised that…
I updated my website to include the word “gentle” next to “massage”. A friend asked me why, as now everyone seeking deep tissue bodywork would not schedule with me.

Well, that’s exactly why I did it! Those people just aren’t my clients. (No offense if you’re one of them. Unless you’re wanting to try something radically different, you will best be served by another therapist.)

Over 20+ years of doing this work, I’ve developed a niche. I’ve seen amazing results with soothing, therapeutic touch and know how it feels in my own body to do the work that is aligned with my goals of providing deep healing and a compassionate presence.

My gentle approach is quite effective for cultivating relaxation and relieving stress and pain. I believe in showing muscles that it’s safe to let go rather than punishing them for being tight, which, btw, only seems to make them tighter!

I’ve heard countless stories from folks who had a previous painful experience with another therapist and were cautiously hopeful that it could be different on my table.

It is. 🙂

I’m not trying to convince anyone to try my style of massage when they are seeking something more intense.

Go forth and get pummeled if that’s what you wish!

If you’re seeking a different experience and don’t want to have to breathe through the discomfort or wake up tomorrow feeling like you’ve been hit by a bus, then maybe a gentle massage is for you.

Gentle does not necessarily mean light pressure.

It might. I have several clients who prefer a light touch.

Gentle means that I meet the muscles where they are and back off at the first sign of resistance. Sometimes it’s quite firm pressure. It means that I can adapt based on what your body is allowing but never try to force anything.

I call it Goldilocks pressure. Not too hard, not too light. And often it changes from one body part to another and from week to week. I’ve learned to tune in and read the muscles and wait for cues to sink in. I’m vigilant for signs that I’ve gone too far.

I’m aiming to melt the muscles by releasing tension via calming the nervous system. It feels like this:

I welcome communication about how we can find a way for you to be comfortable and relaxed. Most importantly, I will absolutely listen to you if you want me to use less pressure. We can have a discussion about that before we begin. Because it totally matters.

Massage doesn’t have to hurt. I’m sorry if you’ve had the experience in the past and you didn’t want that. I’d be delighted to give you a new experience if you’re open to it. Or you might consider a Reiki treatment. It has deeply relaxing and powerful healing results without any pressure at all.

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What the heck is “gentle massage”?

I updated my website to include the word “gentle” next to “massage”. A friend asked me…
Happy New Year!!

For the past few weeks, I’ve been sitting with the question: what monthly special can I offer that will be most supportive for the most people?

A lot of ideas have come through, but mostly from my mind. I’ve been waiting for a response from my soul, which has proven itself to be the wiser guide.

Finally, my instructions have arrived.

Make it easier. Offer a discount for Reiki sessions.

A 24% discount, to be precise, in honor of the new year.

If you find yourself feeling depleted, overdrawn, fatigued, anxious, overwhelmed, underwhelmed, stuck, weighed down, disconnected or otherwise different than how you’d like to feel, Reiki can help.

Book a remote or in-person Reiki session by the end of January 2024 to receive $24 off the normal rate.

(This does not apply to massages or Reiki-massage combinations. Those are more physically demanding and I am carefully navigating a sustainable work load for this body of mine.)

Reiki is a holistic healing modality that promotes stress and pain relief and cultivates optimal wellness by flooding the recipient with life force energy. Not just any ole life-force; spiritually guided life force.

One client describes it as a spiritual hug.

Most people report feeling deeply relaxed and restored and more like themselves.

If you’re wondering if Reiki can be helpful for whatever you’re going through, very likely it can. I use it in my own life for healing injuries and reducing pain (both physical and emotional), connecting with my intuition and creativity, metabolizing stress and the sense of utter dismay at the state of the world, cultivating hormonal balance, digestion and quality sleep, and maintaining my sense of humor along with impeccable discernment as a mature woman navigating the dating scene and urban traffic. It’s the foundation of my spiritual practice and the balm for everything that ails. It’s the primary reason people so often comment on my calmness even amidst the perfect storm that life often cooks up for me.

It is not a magic pill and will not miraculously cure a long-standing, deeply rooted imbalance in the course of an hour. Let’s be real. Nothing can do that! It can, however, break an stress/pain/suffering cycle, help motivate you to take steps in the direction you wish to go and give you the extra oomph to get started.

It works fantastically as a maintenance routine, but also serves as an emergency remedy when the sh*t hits the fan.

It’s my hope that this discount will provide an extra nudge for anyone who has been sitting on the fence considering a session or perhaps the means to do so.

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January 2024 Reiki Special

Happy New Year!! For the past few weeks, I’ve been sitting with the question: what monthly…
I’ve been working with several clients lately who are suffering from hip pain. Interestingly enough, I myself have been experiencing the same discomfort! It seems I learn a lot about my own healing by helping others. Just to be perfectly clear, Dear Universe, I am totally open to learning under more joyful and comfortable circumstances henceforth!

While my practice is soundly rooted in supporting body-mind-spirit balance, I’m focusing simply on the physical approach for this post. Delving into thoughts and beliefs about security, support, and prosperity as well as a sense of connection to the divine do indeed factor into releasing pain in the hips. So does exploring inflammation, biochemistry and diet. But that is a story for another day…

In myself and the clients presenting with hip pain, I notice an imbalance in all the muscle groups that attach to the pelvis. It’s common for hip pain to manifest in the sacro-illiac joint, which is where the spine unites with the pelvis. Sometimes it gets labelled as low back or glut pain. I believe it is the source of the expression “pain in the behind”. It can be accompanied by shooting or throbbing pain or tingling down the leg. And it can range from mildly unpleasant to downright debilitating. I’ve had many a sleepless night due to this issue lately.

So say someone has pain in the left hip. It’s easy to concentrate on the back of the body on the left side. Clearly there is tension in that area (including hamstrings, gluts, and lateral rotators) that needs to be addressed. But looking at the big picture draws me to the right S-I joint. After all we have only one sacrum and one pelvis; any imbalance affects the whole structure. Often I find the piriformis (a muscle that attaches to the sacrum and tends to be a troublemaker!) on the opposite side to be more tense than on the problematic side! Clients are invariable surprised to realize this; but I’ve come to expect it.

Let’s not forget the hip flexors. (Side note: I have no idea why, but there seems to be a good deal of confusion as to where the flexors lie. They’re on the front side of the hip and include the quadriceps as well as that other troublemaker, the psoas.) Once again the client is startled to feel stiffness, achiness, or downright pain once they’ve turned over and I’m working on the anterior side of pelvis.

It’s impossible for me to say with any degree of certainty where the trouble begins. I can’t discern which of the muscles are compensated for or trying to prevent pain. What I absolutely can testify to wholeheartedly is that the whole lot is in cahoots. It’s impossible to effectively address pain in the posterior left hip without exploring the right side as well and both sides of the anterior pelvis. I explain to my clients that my goal is to get all the muscles communicating and operating peacefully rather than playing a tug of war. From there we can begin to suggest and foster harmony and teamwork in the muscular-skeletal system.

As a holistic practitioner, this seems like common sense to me. We are not working with two thighs, two hips, and a pelvis. We are working with one body that is seeking balance any way it can. To support that process, it’s super important to recognize all the players and get them on the same page. While my practice exists mainly in the Philadelphia area, I’m happy to provide coaching for those who reside elsewhere. Visit my website to contact me for details. Life is too short to suffer from a pain in the behind!

Bodywork for that pain in the behind

I’ve been working with several clients lately who are suffering from hip pain. Interestingly enough, I…
These were the words of my elated client as she walked out of my door this morning. She had arrived 45 minutes earlier, stooped and fatigued, wearing slippers because she was unable to tie her shoes. Being a landscape artist causes her to misuse and abuse her body all day long, constantly. Being a determined and driven woman led her to push on through until the pain was unbearable.

It’s not uncommon for people to be in extreme discomfort when they finally seek my help. I do my best to educate folks that bodywork is most effective as a maintenance practice, rather than emergency care, and that if they commit to listening to the body’s signals they can avoid pain altogether. Often times the suggestion of daily stretching is met with a look usually reserved for divorce lawyers and dental drills, and routine massage schedules fall by the wayside.

Like I said, I do my best to educate clients. When their resistance to self-care outweighs my informative presentation, I’m always willing to offer support when it is urgently needed. I wish they wouldn’t wait until they can’t bend to call me, but when they do, I’m humbled and filled with gratitude to have the skill and training to promote bendability when it’s lacking.

I Can Bend!

These were the words of my elated client as she walked out of my door this…
Yesterday I worked with five different massage clients. Four of them complained of stiffness, tightness, and/or pain in their right necks and shoulders- the top of the shoulder, around the top inner corner of the scapula, and up the back of the neck. (In case you’re wondering, I do know the technical terms for these body parts, but wish to keep this blog accessible to the average person who might not.) The fifth client just wanted an overall relaxing massage, but I did find tension in that same area on him as well. The four who presented with pain obviously wanted me to focus on the troublesome area, and one of them said she would be delighted if I spent the entire time squeezing her traps because they hurt so much.

This is a common problem in our modern culture. Our bodies were not designed to sit all day at a keyboard, nor to be exposed to constant stress, nor bombarded ceaselessly with visual and auditory stimulation. Shoulders creep up to the ears, chins jut forward, upper backs round. Slouching happens, seemingly naturally, without constant awareness. Chronic postural challenges overburden the antagonist, or opposite, muscles to keep us upright, and the result are painful. Bodywork is an excellent technique for addressing these issues.

Yet… there’s a piece of the puzzle that often gets overlooked. It’s not what you think! Or rather, the problem is often not where we feel the pain. Merely rubbing, squeezing, or pummeling the overstretched and achy muscles does not address the imbalance at its source. Certainly it does provide relief and accelerates the release of toxins and the flow of fresh blood and oxygen, which is important; but targeting the symptom does not allow for any lasting change to occur.

I noticed in all five of my clients yesterday that the muscles on the left side, in the front of their necks were super tight. This is the exact opposite location of the complaint that the right back of the neck hurt. I was personally not surprised to find this. I noticed such patterns in the beginning of my career after doing the first two or three hundred sessions. Yet the clients were incredulous. They had no idea that tightness in their pecs and anterior deltoids and anterior necks were causing the pain. I explained that the body craves structural balance and that overuse in one area creates a reaction in the body that is often felt in the weaker, opposite muscles. (I am reminded of Newton’s Third Law: “For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction.” and wish I had a better understanding of science so I could tie it in here. Alas, I don’t, so I will leave that to someone else and stick with the experiential data at my disposal.)

These revelations have led me to believe in the power of a full body massage. It’s all connected! An imbalance in the right ankle can ricochet up the body, lodging eventually in the neck or jaw. Imbalance in one area of the body affects the surrounding areas. Sometimes it is the surrounding areas that complain more loudly and capture our attention. Of course it is important to acknowledge the pain that a client is feeling and to address that area. AND it is equally as important, if not more so, to look at the big picture and question why? Why is the right shoulder tight? Where is the tension originating? How can this structure be supported in returning to neutral? Once we begin to explore these arenas, the benefits resulting from bodywork grow exponentially.

It’s Not What You Think!

Yesterday I worked with five different massage clients. Four of them complained of stiffness, tightness, and/or…
“Less is More.” This is a seemingly- heretical philosophy I learned while studying the gentle, energetic bodywork called Ortho-Bionomy. Over the course of giving more than 6,000 massages in the last ten years, I realize that this quite frequently applies to sessions I have given and received. I could expand this theory into many aspects of my life as well, but that is too big a task for this post. How I can most efficiently interpret the phrase “less is more” as it relates to massage in my humble opinion, is to say that bodies very often are more responsive to a gentle touch than to extreme pressure. When I say very often, I mean in 99% of the time, in my experience. Very often.

Yet, popular culture would have us believe that more is always better, or worse yet, “no pain, no gain”. This is essentially the antithesis of my work. Which is not to say that I never go deep, or that every moment of a therapeutic session is luxuriously pleasant. It’s sometimes uncomfortable to restore deep, postural muscles to their original, lengthened state. However, my approach is a slow, gentle one that works with the client’s ability to let go and breathe deeply. I call it a sneak attack and when performed well, the muscles don’t react because they never even knew I was coming. Once the nervous system perceives pain, or even anticipates pain, the fight or flight reflex kicks in and muscles tense, adrenaline is released, and the mind becomes super- alert. This is the exact opposite of the relaxation response in which stress and tension are released and the muscles soften.

It is a huge goal of mine to re-educate the public about the myth of more pressure being the antidote to soreness or pain. The object of healing or releasing tension is not how much “you can take” but rather how much you can release. Bracing yourself to experience deep work in the name of relief is as effective as drinking a triple shot of espresso and riding a roller coaster to help you sleep. People in our society are already super-stressed. Aggressive bodywork is perceived by the nervous system as more stress and most certainly does not create relaxation. It might create an absence of busy thoughts because the mind is focused on sensations, just as being in an emergency situation would focus the mind. This is not the same as relaxation, letting go, feeling safe, or being at peace; and these are the conditions necessary for healing to take place.

Somewhere humans have gotten off track and started believing that having more stuff is the key to happiness, that doing more is the key to freedom, that punishing our bodies will make us healthy. It is beyond time that we re-evaluate our beliefs according to our current values and the reality that we seem to be less happy, less free, less healthy than ever. I encourage everyone to take time out of their busy schedules to experience true relaxation in the form of a flowing, soothing Swedish massage and to feel the true benefits of escaping the adrenaline loop and enjoying the peacefulness that is our natural state. And begin to think about how doing less, spending less, feeling less pain can actually be more. More healthy. And more you.

Less is More

“Less is More.” This is a seemingly- heretical philosophy I learned while studying the gentle, energetic…

pain relief

Happy New Year!!