massage

A good portion of my work is focused on helping folks with chronic muscle tension and the resulting discomfort. Let’s just say I have a fair amount of job security; thanks to the stressfulness of modern-day living there’s no shortage of tension.

I’ve learned some interesting things over the past 20+ years doing massage and Reiki in addition to finding balance in my own body.

Very frequently a protective mechanism is involved and stimulating the muscle(s) to contract. Fighting against a contracted muscle is an arm-wrestling match you can never win.

It could be the nervous system activating the reflex that attempts to ensure your survival by preparing to fight or flee. It does this by tensing the muscles in your extremities.

It could be an old injury, long forgotten, and the resulting movement pattern that continues on long past it’s helpfulness. It could be an emotional upset or energetic blockage.

What these things all have in common is that they are not effectively treated by pummeling, stretching, thumping or mashing a tense muscle.

Protective mechanisms respond to creating a sense of safety and awareness in the body. Gentle, non-invasive, non-painful touch can communicate to the part that is standing guard, hyper-vigilant and overprotective, that it’s ok to let go. Once that message is received, the muscles can relax effortlessly.

Rather than trying to force the muscles, which btw are only following orders from the nervous system, to release, in my work I go right to the command center and convince the boss that it’s time for a new strategy.

This is why a lot of DIY approaches fail. Stretching a muscle that is on high alert/lock down might feel good in the moment, but it does nothing to change the reason why the muscle is tight to begin with. Same goes for getting your GF, BF, BFF, spouse, sister or neighbor to jab an elbow into the knot.

If you’re not experiencing relief from your current approach, I’d like to suggest trying something different in order to invite different results.

Makes sense, right?

I specialize in gentle massage and Reiki treatments to reduce stress, pain and suffering. These are not your ordinary sessions! My clients report deep transformation and relaxation because I communicate with the command center rather than attempting to overpower muscles.

Book yourself an appointment and let’s get started on rewiring your nervous system and giving your muscles a break.

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A Holistic Approach to Muscle Tension and Chronic Pain

A good portion of my work is focused on helping folks with chronic muscle tension and…
I updated my website to include the word “gentle” next to “massage”. A friend asked me why, as now everyone seeking deep tissue bodywork would not schedule with me.

Well, that’s exactly why I did it! Those people just aren’t my clients. (No offense if you’re one of them. Unless you’re wanting to try something radically different, you will best be served by another therapist.)

Over 20+ years of doing this work, I’ve developed a niche. I’ve seen amazing results with soothing, therapeutic touch and know how it feels in my own body to do the work that is aligned with my goals of providing deep healing and a compassionate presence.

My gentle approach is quite effective for cultivating relaxation and relieving stress and pain. I believe in showing muscles that it’s safe to let go rather than punishing them for being tight, which, btw, only seems to make them tighter!

I’ve heard countless stories from folks who had a previous painful experience with another therapist and were cautiously hopeful that it could be different on my table.

It is. 🙂

I’m not trying to convince anyone to try my style of massage when they are seeking something more intense.

Go forth and get pummeled if that’s what you wish!

If you’re seeking a different experience and don’t want to have to breathe through the discomfort or wake up tomorrow feeling like you’ve been hit by a bus, then maybe a gentle massage is for you.

Gentle does not necessarily mean light pressure.

It might. I have several clients who prefer a light touch.

Gentle means that I meet the muscles where they are and back off at the first sign of resistance. Sometimes it’s quite firm pressure. It means that I can adapt based on what your body is allowing but never try to force anything.

I call it Goldilocks pressure. Not too hard, not too light. And often it changes from one body part to another and from week to week. I’ve learned to tune in and read the muscles and wait for cues to sink in. I’m vigilant for signs that I’ve gone too far.

I’m aiming to melt the muscles by releasing tension via calming the nervous system. It feels like this:

I welcome communication about how we can find a way for you to be comfortable and relaxed. Most importantly, I will absolutely listen to you if you want me to use less pressure. We can have a discussion about that before we begin. Because it totally matters.

Massage doesn’t have to hurt. I’m sorry if you’ve had the experience in the past and you didn’t want that. I’d be delighted to give you a new experience if you’re open to it. Or you might consider a Reiki treatment. It has deeply relaxing and powerful healing results without any pressure at all.

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What the heck is “gentle massage”?

I updated my website to include the word “gentle” next to “massage”. A friend asked me…
Over the past few weeks, four mothers have contacted me to schedule treatments for their teenage children. I couldn’t be more delighted! How wonderful that they have the opportunity to learn the value of listening to and honoring their bodies and emotions at a young age. I feel like I’m inducting them all into a revolutionary counterculture club in which cultivating health includes creating body/mind/spirit balance and freely flowing life-force energy.

I love teaching them that bodywork is much more complex than pushing hard on a tight muscle or rubbing where it hurts. I wish everyone knew this! I’m thrilled to introduce such a radical concept to anyone anytime, but the idea of someone starting off their bodywork experiences knowing this little gem can set them up for amazing results over time.

What’s most exciting is educating them about their autonomy during a session. (Yes, I meant autonomy, not anatomy!) They get to say what they’d like to work on and what they need to be comfortable. They can tell me to avoid anything they don’t like, and I will, even if I think it’s important to the treatment. We might have a chat about it, but they get the final word. They have the power to end the session immediately without needing to explain why. They can say “ouch” or “no” during a massage if they want less pressure or for me to move on to another area.

It occurred to me while discussing this with a young woman that these guidelines apply to people of all ages, but I don’t usually take the time to discuss them with adults. I assume that grown-ups know. But there is a seeming power differential in the treatment room where the professional can be seen as the expert. We’re standing, the client is lying down. We’re fully dressed and they, at the very least, have taken their shoes off. These factors can make it look like we’re in charge.

But we’re not.

The client is always the expert on their needs. Always.

However old you are, I hope you’ll hear me when I say this! You’re the boss of your session. OK, there are limits, and you won’t get a great treatment by micromanaging your therapist. We do have extensive training and many of us years, decades even, of experience. But “no” means no during a session. If your practitioner will not honor that, find one who does. There are plenty of times in life when we are not fully in control of our experiences, but healing treatments should not be one of them.

If you’re a caregiver for a child who needs some support, please contact me to discuss treatment options.

I wish everyone knew this about bodywork…

Over the past few weeks, four mothers have contacted me to schedule treatments for their teenage…
So many of us spend hours in positions that aren’t great for our bodies. Understanding a bit about body mechanics can point us toward remedies that effectively correct the imbalance rather than making it worse.

The vast majority of approaches I see people taking either don’t work or… sadly, make it worse. Check out my rubber band demonstration to see why.

I made this short video to demonstrate the remedy I use to keep myself feeling good no matter how much time I spend hunched over the massage table or keyboard.

No matter my good intentions for not hunching, I invariably end up in positions that are not great for me when I get immersed in what I’m doing. I’m guessing you can relate.

An alternative is to book a session! Massage, Reiki and my signature combo treatments can all treat muscle tension, ease stress and pain, and increase circulation and focus. Get yourself some support if you’re suffering.

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Tight Neck? Stiff Shoulders? I’ve Got You!

So many of us spend hours in positions that aren’t great for our bodies. Understanding a…
I get this question a lot from new clients. Is Reiki or massage better? It’s common knowledge that both are helpful for reducing stress and pain, so how does one choose which treatment will provide the most relief?

First of all, neither is better. They’re both fabulous. Just different.

For people who don’t wish to get undressed, don’t want their hair to get mucked up, or don’t like to be touched, Reiki is the perfect solution. Clients remain fully clothed, no oil or lotion is used, and healing energy can be transferred either with or without touch. For those who enjoy the gliding or kneading of bodywork or the moisturizing benefit of being coated in massage cream, well that’s an obvious choice as well.

For the rest of us, it all depends on the goals for the session and the origin of the stressors. Massage is extremely helpful for correcting postural imbalances from sitting too long at a desk and for muscle aches from repetitive movements. It’s my go-to technique for issues that are firmly rooted in the physical body.

For concerns that arise primarily from the mental/emotional realm, I find Reiki to be more helpful. For example, the type of stress that is unleashed from having too much to do and too little time. Reiki is brilliant. It excels at resetting the inner alarm system that keeps us on edge when we’re trying to unplug for a rest. Anxiety, depression, and insomnia all respond particularly well, as does old trauma that was hasn’t yet been released fully.

Yet it really isn’t as black or white as that. The physical, mental and emotional bodies are all interwoven and constantly impact one another. If I’m worried about meeting a deadline, the concern begins in my mind but it triggers physiological affect as well. If I spend 12 hours in front of my computer, it’s my body that is slumped over and achy, but my mood also pays a price.

If we bring in spiritual aspirations such as reclaiming worthiness or embodying the divine, the waters get even murkier. Releasing tension from the muscles allows us greater freedom to pursue a meditation practice or creative projects. And using Reiki to bring the chakras into alignment or balancing the flow of energy top to toe can give us the fuel we need to really dig into the necessary action steps.

The good news is, you don’t have to choose. This needn’t be an either/or situation. It can be a both/and scenario. It’s possible to blend energywork and bodywork together in a treatment. I really enjoy offering combination sessions as I can pull what’s most useful from each system for the immediate circumstances. Or it’s possible to alternate modalities depending on what your unique needs are on that particular day. This might require some advanced planning if you’re seeing two different practitioners. However, there are quite a lot of us hybrids out there who can adapt relatively easily.

I don’t think I’ve done a very good job answering the question! I guess my short answer is, it depends. In the care of a skilled and caring practitioner, you really can’t go wrong though. Either modality can be an effective tool for most complaints. Rather than trying to analyze the benefits intellectually, I think you’ll get a lot more information from experiencing a session. When in doubt, place a hand over your heart and inquire within. You have a great well of wisdom inside and who knows better than you what is in your best interest?

Which is Better, Reiki or Massage?

I get this question a lot from new clients. Is Reiki or massage better? It’s common…
One of my greatest joys as a massage therapist is helping people reduce or eliminate pain through a body-mind-spirit approach. When a client tells me that she hasn’t had any headaches since her two appointment two weeks ago, I get excited. When she tells me that it’s very rare for her to go that long without a migraine, let alone a “regular” headache, I’m practically jumping for joy.

Photo by Pete Johnson on Pexels.com

Lately I’m seeing more and more clients for headache relief, many of whom have tried all sorts of medications, various therapies, or dietary changes. This particularly client is getting Botox injections, which help but don’t eliminate her pain, and wear off weeks before her insurance company is willing to pay for the next round. Massage seems to be bridging that gap without contributing any unwanted side effects.

The best part of this story is that I’m using good ole-fashioned Swedish massage. No fancy techniques. No deep tissue. No discomfort whatsoever during a session. My goal is to activate the relaxation response, in which the body’s internal feel-good pharmacy gets triggered. Digestion and nutrient assimilation are enhanced, the immune and lymphatic systems are supported, the cardiovascular system calms, and the endocrine system is supported.

Swedish massage manually promotes the relaxation of muscles and encourages circulation and the elimination of cellular waste and toxins. It’s rather like wringing out a dirty sponge, then running it under fresh hot water. As the body adjusts to its new, less-constricted state, internal mechanisms are nudged to promote balance from within. The combination of the relaxation response and the manual “wringing out” therapy is a two-pronged strategy for reducing headaches.

Many of my clients are able to reduce frequency, duration, and/or intensity of chronic headaches with one or two massages each month. For them bodywork is a form of alternative care which prevents them from seeking medical intervention. Many others are less than satisfied with the results of their medical intervention, and get great relief from massage as a complementary therapy.

You don’t need to give up modern medicine to enjoy the benefits of massage. It might just be the key that allows you to celebrate a fortnight free of headaches. And a fortnight after that. And another and another. Why not give it a try?

Celebrating No Headaches!

One of my greatest joys as a massage therapist is helping people reduce or eliminate pain…
“The problem I have with massage…” is not exactly the phrase I wanted to hear from a new client! (Yikes! What have I gotten myself into?!) “…is that I’m unable to verbalize when the pressure is too deep.”

“Aaaah… I can total relate! I’ve experienced this frequently myself.” (I sigh with both relief and empathy!) She went on to explain that even when the therapist invites her to speak up, she just can’t do it and ends up feeling sore for days afterward.

Many of us were not raised in an environment that supported us voicing our needs and desires. Sometimes it wasn’t safe to do so. Programming begins at a very young age, and when we receive the message that our preferences don’t matter, we might adapt by shutting down to protect ourselves. Children might learn to keep their requests quiet out of fear of upsetting the adult in charge, and choose instead a strategy of remaining silent in order to be accepted. Heartbreakingly, we might internalize the message that we don’t deserve to be comfortable or nurtured or that nobody cares what we need.

This cycle can be broken if we intervene, but many of our childhood coping mechanisms run on auto-pilot until challenged. Massage is already a tricky situation because the receiver is in a vulnerable position, both physically and emotionally. Once the relaxation response kicks in, our rational thought and speech centers are subdued. It’s easy to feel that the therapist is the authority who holds all the power, and to slip into the erroneous belief that they know what is best. We’re certainly trained to think this way by the western medicine model.

You are the authority on your body! Please remember this!

I commended this woman for her awareness and for having the courage not only to show up, but to share this with me. Given that I use a gentle pressure and am able to tune in to the nervous system’s response, I felt confident that we could successfully work together. We negotiated a new strategy in which I would ask if she’d like less pressure because she said it felt easy for her to answer “yes” if that were the case.

For the same reason, I ask if a client is feeling chilly rather than if they’re warm enough. I’ve witnessed again and again that someone will say they’re fine only to discover goose bumps moments later. Sometimes the reply is that they don’t want me to go to any trouble or to interrupt the flow. Please believe me when I say that any qualified, caring massage therapist does not want you shivering or flinching on the table!

We can all learn to be more sensitive to one anther’s needs and recognize the difficulty that many people have asking for what they want. Posing a question so that they may respond with “yes” will be helpful for those with a people pleaser coping mechanism. (There’s a lot of us out there!) I find that slowing down, listening deeply without intent to formulate a reply, and tuning in to body language is beneficial.

We can also learn to express our concerns upfront and ask for help when we have difficulty. This can be a stretch from our comfort zone for sure, but if you believe your massage therapist will not respond supportively, it’s probably a hint to find one that will. Speaking to the therapist before booking a session can shed some light on their listening skills and activating intuition can serve as a filtering process.

Massage shouldn’t hurt! (Not unless you want it to, and even then it’s debatable. That’s a discussion for another day.) I’m here to advocate for everyone everywhere to speak up for themselves and ask for what they need. If you find words are elusive in a session, try a simple “Ouch!” And if that is not respected, “STOP”. There is absolutely no need to suffer in silence on the table. Life is painful enough as it is, there’s no reason to endure more at the hands (or elbows) of a hired professional.

The problem I have with massage…

“The problem I have with massage…” is not exactly the phrase I wanted to hear from…
I get this question a lot. People want definitive answers before committing to a session. My short answer is, yes. Every session helps. Each step we make towards improving our health and wellness counts. 98% of my clients leave each and every session feeling better than when they arrived.

And… it’s really not quite that simple. I liken healing to getting out of debt. Will one payment help reduce your credit card balance? Sure. Will it eliminate the deficit that has been accruing for decades? Maybe, but probably not.

It’s the same with massage and Reiki treatments. The results depend on so many factors that it’s impossible for me to predict with absolute accuracy how long it will take for any particular issue to be resolved. The intensity and duration of any discomfort is an important consideration as well as lifestyle choices. Activities, thoughts, and behaviors that add to or detract from the underlying imbalance most definitely play a roll. Willingness to let go and embrace change will certainly enhance the efficacy of every treatment, as will efforts to cultivate and preserve the body’s physiological relaxation response.

Consider the goal of being debt free. The degree of debt, income, spending habits, savings and gifts must all be calculated. It’s much the same in healing. Are you making more deposits into your health and wellness account than withdrawals? Are you reducing your harmful spending habits? Are you willing to take on extra work to boost your healing income?

These are all investments beyond the scope of any one treatment. So while yes, one session will help, it’s ultimately your participation in the process that will speed your arrival at the finish line. I’ve seen clients experience tremendous progress through making healthier choices on a daily basis as well as clients who remain stuck on a plateau if receiving bi-monthly treatments is their only contribution.

There’s no right or wrong here. I’m happy to help clients maintain their health when seeing me is the only effort they are able or willing to make, and I enjoy supporting those who wish to take more active roles and rely less on my efforts. There’s a place for everyone in my practice. But if you want to get better faster, you’ll need to get involved and start making frequent deposits into your health account.

Will One Session Help?

I get this question a lot. People want definitive answers before committing to a session. My…
“This is the first time I really understood what it means to be kind to my body.”

A client said this to me after a massage. We might have been sitting, but I was totally jumping for joy on the inside. Also the Hallelujah Chorus was playing in my head.

Before the session, we had discussed my kinder, gentler approach to bodywork. I had explained how my goal is to activate the physiological relaxation response that triggers all the feel-good body chemistry and can help break the pain cycle. She understood that I planned to use a moderate pressure to coax the muscles into releasing tension while stimulating circulation, detoxification, and dare I say? Pleasure.

She knew that was the plan, but had no idea how very healing this approach could be. “But you didn’t even attack the knots!” No, I certainly did not! There is no benefit from attacking. Those knots are a symptom of imbalance. I’m much more interested in relieving the root cause of the imbalance, which so very often is… stress. Treating the stress lessens tension and often knots evaporate on their own.

Relaxation is a remedy for stress and pain. Creating more pain through aggressive massage is not a recipe for relaxation. Even intense work that falls just short of pain can stimulate the fight, flight, or freeze response which then triggers… muscle tension. Just like you can’t get carrots by planting cucumber seeds, you cannot cultivate relaxation through pain.

She left feeling considerable relief from the chronic pain that had been plaguing her almost constantly. The next week she reported that she’d had much less discomfort following her treatment, and that it was the first time massage had ever had any noticeable effect. What a victory! I have a feeling this new perspective on being kind to her body will continue to have helpful results as well.

I could have brushed off my hands right there and then and retired happily.

But of course I didn’t because I love my work and there’s so much more of it to be done.

Onwards!

Massage for Chronic Pain

“This is the first time I really understood what it means to be kind to my…